the old switcheroo…

STILL IN SCHOOL:  You’ve pulled an all-nighter but that Psych paper just ain’t writing itself? Mistakenly pass in that English Lit paper you’ve already done, buying yourself a little bit more time to finish. Who needs to cheat and buy an assignment? Let the system work for you. Deadlines?! What? Who?

OUT OF SCHOOL AND BUSTED BROKE:  This ploy used to work for utility bills as well, but may not these days. Send a check to the phone company made out to the electric at your own risk. At least you’ll have a story that just might resonate with the poor offshore individual chirpily handling your customer cervix needs and getting paid chattel to do it…Does anyone still use checks to pay bills? At this point in life, cut and run while you still can and go volunteer/vacation at Hostel El Encuentro in Guatape Colombia. Hike Piedra de El Peñol instead of wrapping the same size rock around yo neck by getting a 9-5.

SLAVING AWAY IN CORPORATE AMERICA: The above exercises will not work, cannot be applied in the hellish playpen of corporate america. If you are smart enough to be convincing re; the above innocuous ruses (yes, innocuous), then you are too smart to waste your time playing dumb for the infinite period of time required in this particular milieu. The talent to formulate ostensibly definitive statements comprised of endless prepositional phrases and middle management jargon 101, ultimately illustrating no definitive position at all, is required.

I could have just said you need to know how to say nothing in 50 words or more. But that’s a whole ‘notha post.